Why cuss when you can use this fun image of snoop dogg?
This gif says nothing, and everything at the same time
Ah, Ramen. The instant stuff weeaboos and college kids eat almost 3 times a day. What a treasure.
You know what I’m gonna teach you what to make? Ramen that isn’t instant, and doesn’t taste like you poured an entire fucking salt shaker into your fucking bowl. God damn…MSG, amirite?
Anyway, this recipes like pretty fucking delish, so we’re gonna have a pretty rad time making it, okay?
O FUCKING KAY.
(servings: 1 bowl)
adapted from: x
Ingredients for Home made noodles-
- 3/4 cups all purpose flour
- 1 egg
- 3/4 tsp salt (plus more to taste)
- ~1 Tbsp water (or more give or take)
Ingredients for soup-
- 2 cups pork or vegetable broth*
- 1 Tbsp fresh miso paste
- 1 tsp soy sauce (add more if you want it to be saltier)
- 1/4 tsp dashi granules
- 1/4 cup fresh bean sprouts
Ingredients for toppings-
- 1/2 scallion stalk
- 1 egg, hard boiled
- 1 piece of thick cut ham sliced in half
- 1 Tbsp olive oil
Procedure for noodles-
- Mix all of the dry ingredients together and make a small ‘well’ in the center of the mixture.
- Mix all of the wet ingredients together and pour the mixture into the center ‘well’ of the dry ingredients.
- Slowly combine the ingredients together until it becomes a hard dough.
- Knead that dough hardcore motherfucker. Knead it the same way you need every little bit of merch with your waifu’s face on it. Yeah I know i said ‘need’ instead of ‘knead’. Fight me. I dare you.
- Roll it into a ball and test the consistency. If it’s WAY too stick, add some flour, if it’s really hard and not sticky at all, add a TEENY bit of water. The dough should only be a tiny bit sticky, like not enough to stick anyway, u feel me
- Once the doughs at the right consistency, wrap the dough ball in a dish towel and let that shit rest for like an hour. You rocked it’s work, tiger, and now it just needs to recharge a little. Am I implying you had sexual relations with a noodle? Yes. sort of. It’s been a long day.
- Take the dough ball once it’s rested and sprinkle flour over that shit. Make it rain, holla. place it on a flour’d counter and use a rolling pin to flatten it out. Like real talk.
- If the dough starts sticking during the rolling process, slap some more flour on that shit.
- Put the dough sheet on your cutting board and spread a bunch of flour over it. Real talk, get reaaaaaal liberal about your flour use here. You DO NOT want your noodles sticking together once we cut them.
- Fold the sheet two times in the same direction, spreading flour over the sheet each time you fold it.
- Once it’s folded, start cutting it into thin noodles. If you think it’s going to start stick, add some more flour onto that biz.
- Once you’re done cutting them and you have a huge ass pile of noodles, toy at them a little with your fingers to unfold and separate them a bit. Then toss that shit around with some more flour.
- Get some water bowling, enough to cover all the noodles, and just sort of sprinkle the noodles in. If you plop em all in they’ll stick and shit, so don’t do that.
- Cook for abot 4 minutes, tasting a noodle occasionally to see if they’re done. I like undercooking mine a tiny bit so they fully cook in the soup.
- Once they’re done cooking, strain them and place them in the bowl you’re gonna eat from.
- And bam. You finished the noodles. Are you proud of yourself? Do you want a hug? Fuck off, we’re not done yet ho we still got a WORLD of shit to finish before you can eat this mystical creation based off of Miyazaki’s food porn masterpiece.
Procedure for Soup-
- In a medium sized pot, add the stock, dashi, and soy sauce. Bring it to a boil over high heat.
- Remove from heat and stir in the miso. If you want to add more miso or something, fuckin go for it, it’s your life.
- Add the bean sprouts in now so they warm up a little. Pour the soup into the bowl of noodles and stir it around so the bean sprouts and noodles are all intertwined.
Oh hot damn. You finished dat soup. Wow. how cool are you? Not that cool yet, because you still need to do the last few toppings you lil shitbaby.
Procedure for toppings-
- Pour enough water to cover an egg into a small pot and bring to a boil. Once boiling, place the egg in gently and let it stay there for like 10 minutes.
- Once the egg’s cooked for about 10 minutes, take that shit out and place it in a small bowl of ice water so it can cool down.
- Once it’s cooled, remove the shell and cut it in half vertically. Place one of the halves on top of the ramen and eat the other one yourself with a sprinkle of salt because you deserve it. Love yourself a little.
- Get some thick cut ham slices, like the thickest you can find, get a piece and cut it in half. Drizzle a frying pan with olive oil and let it heat up before placing the ham slices on there.
- Cook until heated up but not browned and place atop the noodles.
- Thinly dice half the chive stock and place it atop the noodles as well.
HOLY SHIT YOU JUST MADE YOURSELF SOME MIYAZAKI NOODLES
ARE YOU PROUD? YOU SHOULD BE. YOU BASICALLY MADE ART.
No seriously, put that shit in MOMA and it will probably sell a lot quicker than like, fuckin, idk, cubism or whatever. Because Ramen always tastes better than oil paint, trust me.
Alright nerds, that’s Ponyo’s Ramen for you, enjoy eating literally 10 bowls of it while crying over fucking fish people you sad piece of trash.
LOVE YOU, BYE
somebody make me this :(
i keep forgetting im drawing lmao here u go
Coming Out Simulator 2014 - a half-true game about half-truths
Coming Out Simulator is exactly what it says it is. It’s a free-to-play conversation simulator based on/inspired by the personal story of coming out of its creator, Nicky Case.
There’s no easy answer in Coming Out Simulator, no optimal ending to be achieved if you collect the requisite amount of points. Case based the game off a pivotal moment in his own life as a teenager. And just like in real life, the moment of “coming out” in this game is traumatic no matter which way the player chooses to approach it.
Ultimately, it’s liberating as well. But that’s not what the brunt of the experience playing Coming Out Simulator is actually like. […] There’s power in exploring a fantasy like the one in Mass Effect 3, but there’s also power in being reminded that “coming out” the way one does in that game is a fantasy, and a pretty far-fetched one for many people who faced far more difficult challenges when they actually came out.
Coming Out Simulator is a game about that second experience. It’s a painful one. But it’s also a necessary one, that I think more people who’ve never had to struggle with their own sexual identity should see for themselves.
this game made me cry omfg
La Vie En Rose
How people imagine asexuals/aromantics are
How they really are
"Maybe you’re not [heterosexual/homosexual/some kind of allosexual], maybe you’re just [insert love interests name]-sexual"
NO, NO THERE IS AN ACTUAL LEGITIMATE NAME FOR THAT
THERE IS A NAME FOR ONLY BEING ABLE TO FEEL SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO THOSE YOU HAVE A DEEP EMOTIONAL BOND WITH
Submissions have been slower the last few weeks. We’re rolling the queue back to one post per day until things pick up again, just so we don’t have a gap in content. Please continue to submit fics to us, particularly fics for ships and fandoms that don’t have a lot of representation on here!
On a related note, someone requested awhile back that we post some Divergent fics, particularly the ship Four/Tris. I can’t help personally as I know literally nothing about Divergent, but maybe one of our followers could help that person out?
No, for the love of anything you worship, don’t remove your amygdala. I’ve written at least two research papers on it and you DO NOT WANT TO REMOVE YOUR AMYGDALA.
This is it…this is the scene that killed me.
When you’re doodling in class and the teacher catches you
Often regarded as the “First Lady of Physics”, Dr. Chien-Shiung Wu received numerous honors, awards and honorary degrees for her accomplishments. During World War II, her work involving nuclear fission caught the attention of the American government which resulted in her invitation to contribute to the Manhattan Project (a secret project to develop the atomic bomb) at Columbia University. Wu contributed to the development of a process that enriched uranium ore.
PSA: Chien-Shiung Wu was the awesomest.